K.A.C. - T - 18 Days ...

     Time to give your eyeballs a rest from the K.A.C. - today you can let your ears do the walking as we celebrate holiday music ... with a twist.

     Let's start with the picture on the left. When you hear the Christmas carol 'The Little Drummer Boy' , what's the first thing that comes to mind? A boy with a drum? The Baby in the manger? No, of course not ... it's Grace Jones! WHAT ??? Oh, it SO happened - back in 1988, in fact, on Pee-Wee's Christmas Special. Want to relive this Surrealistic Santa moment? Just click on the link! Thanks to Bill for the find!
www.youtube.com/watch?v=uETyXE2mE2E

     Next, let's step into the Wayback Machine and head back to 1949, and the Screen Song cartoon SNOW FOOLIN' - a Famous Studios production which (hard as it may be for us to believe now) was quite popular in the theaters of the day, where audiences would "follow the Bouncing Ball" {in this case, an egg} and sing a popular tune - can you imagine going to the movies today and trying to get that to happen?
Well, it took place all the time back in the 1940s and in this winter-themed cartoon, you (and your friends and co-workers) can sing along to 'Jingle Bells'! The interesting thing about this is the song has alternate lyrics that I haven't seen anywhere else - give it a look!
www.youtube.com/watch?v=_faPt0BGqP8

      Are all these earfuls of Christmas cheer making you crazy? Then get out your Kleenex, as we're ending today's aural assault with two of the saddest holiday hits ever made. First, the immortal Roy Orbison with his sad saga 'Pretty Paper' - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jOgsyNAsoWc

    

Finally, we leave you with the saddest Christmas song you will EVER hear, from my favorite folk artist Stan Rogers. Many an artist can sing a song and go through the motions with the words, but Stan had the ability to make you feel that he had LIVED the tales he was singing about in his beautiful, deep voice. If you've never heard his music, I urge you to track down his albums. Stan died tragically at a very young age, but his music lives on and I am proud to present this. A word of warning: I will post this and make sure the link works, but aside from that will not listen to it myself (for now) - it is the only song I know that makes me cry every single time I listen to it. Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you First Christmas.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=chTMOuuUZi4 


      On that note, let's all take a moment to compose ourselves and come back tomorrow for more holiday shenanigans - see you then.

K.A.C. - T - 19 Days ...

     Today in our K.A.C. Poinsettia Potpourri, we're going to throw a number of random holiday weirdness up and see what sticks ... and we're not paying your cleaning bills - forewarned is forearmed! Let's see what we have here ...

     Well, I can't think of a creepier place to begin a Monday post than this! When you think of Santa Claus, what's the first thing that comes to mind? Presents? Reindeer? Milk and cookies? Safe sex?
     Wait ... what ??? Yes, boys and girls, the Santa to your left is made entirely of ... condoms. Why, you ask? Hey, that's what we're here for ... we're nothing if not educational at the K.A.C. To learn more about the Prophylactic Pixie, check out the Huffington Post entry here: www.huffingtonpost.com/2009/12/05/condom-claus-photo_n_381347.html 

     Remember last Friday's entry regarding the bacon Christmas card? What could possibly top that? Glad you asked ... behold the Meat Nativity! Blasphemous or delicious ... or both? You can decide AND get the recipe here:
 www.geekologie.com/2010/12/mmmmmmm_wise_men_the_meat_nati.php

          Finally, let's end today on a happy note. Want the Ultimate Fanboy Christmas gift for your favorite geek? Look no further than the TARDIS Murphy Bed! Squeee !!!
Yes, it's a working bed in the shape of the Dr. Who's flying British Police Telephone Box and it's for sale! To read more about it, go here: www.geekologie.com/2010/12/up_for_auction_dr_who_tardis_m.php 

      There's also more info and pix of it here: 
io9.com/5703484/spend-every-night-with-the-doctor-in-this-awesome-tardis-bed

     OK, there should be a little something for everyone here today  - enjoy! Back tomorrow with more Christmas Curiosities!

K.A.C. - T - 20 Days ...

     Are you tired and rundown? Been imbibing too much at too many Christmas parties? Can't remember what you did to who in that holiday haze? Brother, you ain't got nothin' on this little fella to your left.
He's the subject of entry # 7 in our '13 Strangest Christmas Shorts' series of films. 

      Yes, the astrally projecting mouse is Sniffles, a Warner Brothers creation who was the lead in a minor series of cartoons for the studio, including his starring role in today's offering, entitled BEDTIME FOR SNIFFLES. From 1940, this Chuck Jones cartoon has the titular mouse awake on Christmas Eve and damned and determined to stay up 'till midnight to see Santa Claus. However, everything ... and I mean EVERYTHING ... is stacked against him to drag him off  to sweet, blessed sleep - in his comfy bed ... with the soft covers and the warm, downy pillow and ... well, you get the idea.

     Unfortunately, what could have been a sweet, SHORT cartoon  goes on and on an ON ... to the point where you're wishing Sniffles would stumble sleepily into a well-placed mousetrap. It's eight minutes of treacly goodness, so have your insulin handy and enjoy BEDTIME FOR SNIFFLES!

http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=639_1261591517

      Back with more tomorrow - see you!

K.A.C. - T - 21 Days ...

     WHOA! What the heck happened here? Have the little tykes walked in on Santa 'in flagrante delicto'? Did the Klaus-meister leave his pants back on the sleigh? Have they stumbled upon the Horrible Secret of WHY "not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse?" 

     NO! It's worse ... much worse as you'll see when you watch entry # 6 in our '13 Strangest Christmas Shorts' contest. From 1947, it's A Present For Santa Claus and if ever there was a film just BEGGING for a MST3K/Rifftrax audio track, this is the one! For now, though, we'll have to make do with the snarky goodness of the write-up by XmasFLIX (which you'll find directly below the video). Enjoy!

www.youtube.com/watch?v=oykHQ0cHdEg

     Come back tomorrow for our smarmiest entry of the year --- see you!

K.A.C. - T - 22 Days ...

ONE.

WORD.
                                                        
 B A C O N !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

     Yes, bacon .... bacon Christmas cards tops off our list today of this years' edition of Worst Cards of 2010. If bacon doesn't grab you, then how about the traditional 'family' cards ... or not ... pophangover.com/2009/12/07/worst-family-christmas-cards-of-2009/


... or REALLY not ...

     Creepy enough you? No? Then go DIRECTLY to Creepy Santa Photos to round out your day! 


www.creepysantaphotos.com/category/pets-animals/

     Coming this weekend: Our next two entries in the '13 Strangest Christmas Shorts' competition!

          

K.A.C. - T - 23 Days ...

# 1: ____________________

     Santa's Seven Sweeties are lined up in a row to wish YOU a Merry Christmas! You know the drill here, people ... just give me the names of ALL of our Cinematic Christmas Cuties ... some are very easy, some are rather hard. Think you've got what it takes to unwrap their names? Then give it a spin! You can click on the pictures to embiggen then, if that helps! Thanks to Mark W. for the link to this years' quiz!


     Check your answers here: 42ndblackwatch1881.wordpress.com/2009/12/24/merry-christmas-a-holiday-hot-totty-retrospective/

     Enjoy!

     Coming Tomorrow: The worst Christmas cards of the year - see you!

# 2: _____________________

# 3: ________________________

# 4: _________________________

# 5: ________________________

# 6: ________________________

# 7: __________________________

K.A.C. - T - 24 Days ...

     It’s Reader Submission Day here at the K.A.C. – so thanks in advance to all of you who have sent things in – here we go!

    
   
  

   

          

     Need a last-minute gift for that special ‘hard to clean’ guy in your life? How about THESE shower products? For the REAL 'manly man', there's The Shower Hammer, Bad Ass Aromas and my personal favorite, the Gladiator Genie Soap!

hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/2010/11/news-update-dramatic-montage-and-video.html?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+Hyperbole-and-a-half+(Hyperbole-And-A-Half)  - As Peiwen says, “You should all use products by Sueeve!”

     You’ve seen those houses that have the million and one lights which are synchronized to play to Christmas carols, right? The ones that cause brownouts in the neighborhood for the month of December, not to mention causing backed-up traffic on the street by gawking tourists? Brother, consider yourself lucky! You could be dealing with THIS!

  

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HFjI7gT1FvI&feature=player_embedded#

    

    

STILL too tame for you? Then how about attending a production of A KLINGON CHRISTMAS CAROL? That's right, puny human, an intergalactic holiday THROWDOWN! Read all about it:

boingboing.net/2009/11/20/a-klingon-christmas.html

      Seems only fair to have the Federation represented here, as well --- equal time and all, you know.

     

      Finally, if you're planning on taking a kid to see Santa this year, why not go for the best? Don't waste your time with those bargain basement, no-nothing Santas! No, sir, you want a SPECIAL Santa for your kid - only the best will do! Like what? Like a newly-minted graduate from Santa School!  Seriously, you didn't think they would have something like this by now? In case you feel your higher education is sadly lacking, here's the enrollment info: 

  

http://www.santaclausschool.com/

Tomorrow: Our Annual ‘Guess the Holiday Hotties’ contest – we’ve got all new pics to stump you with!