Thursday, December 24, 2020

K.A.C. 2020 - T - 1 ...


     Well, she seems nice ... thought we were going to end this on a cheery note, did you, lads and lasses? Well, we are, in our own special K.A.C. way, by leaving you with one of the most famous ghost stories literature has to offer - and it has ties to Christmas, even if they're the most tenuous, spider-filament-thin ties. 

      The Woman In Black: A Ghost Story began it's life (unlife?) as a 1983 novel by Susan Hill. Catching the public by storm upon its publication, it has been compared to the likes of Shirley Jackson and Stephen King (although I think the Jackson comparison is much more apt). It's been adapted in a number of media forms, from audiobooks to made for television films to features, and, as Wikipedia points out, it the second-longest-running stage play in the history of the West End, after (Agatha Christie's) The Mousetrap.

      My son Justin is a huge fan of this book and has given me some fascinating tidbits about the story, namely that the ending has been changed in each incarnation, from the 'unfilmable' ending in the original story, to the stunning ending in the 1989 television film to the 'happy' (?) ending in the 2012 film adaptation starring Daniel Radcliffe.

     I feel the 1989 version is the best of them all, as it takes its time building up a pervading sense of dread until unleashing its true horror literally In Your Face that will have you burrowing in your blankets (as I unashamedly did), but urge you to seek out the original book. Until then, here is the link for the British television version - you know the drill: turn out the lights, turn off your phone and bundle up: things are about to get A LOT colder - enjoy!

     Oh, and the tenuous Christmas link? It comes from the original story, when the narrator is asked by children on Christmas Eve to join in telling ghost stories, something it is established he is always unwilling to do each year. With his guard down and his patience gone, he sits down to tell them the One Story that will cure them from ever asking him this again ...

     You can read (or hear) the original story online here: 

     The 2012 film version with Daniel Radcliffe is worth your time, as well, and was the first version of the tale I saw. Having nothing to compare it to, I found it splendidly chilling, yet was surprised to hear the ending had been changed. However, RUN, don't walk, away from the 2015 cash-grab sequel The Woman In Black: Angel Of Death. It's horrifying, all right, but for all the wrong reasons. 

     You can also find a number of filmed stage adaptations of the story on YouTube worth your time, should you be so inspired. However you decide to view it, you won't soon forget this (literally) haunting story.



     After that, you're probably going to want to settle your nerves .... what better way than sitting by the blazing Yule Log, sipping something hot, bundled up and listening to something a bit more soothing to take the chill of that last story out of your bones. Don't have a fireplace, you say? Not a problem! As reminds us today, beginning in 1966, "New York's WPIX, Channel 11, replaces its regularly scheduled programming with Christmas music and a shot of a log burning in a fireplace, shot in Gracie Mansion. Viewers cozy up to their TVs, and a tradition is born that will extend to other TV markets and beyond."

     Fast forward to 2020 and there are a slew of various Yule Log videos available to choose from. Here's how to set yours up:

    So you've got the virtual Yule Log blazing, check. You've got your hot toddy, check. You've got your blankets, robes, cats, etc., all bundled up, check. All you're missing to make the evening complete as you wait for Santa is something to listen to - well, the K.A.C. has you covered there, too, and it's perfect for tonight! 

      Settle in and listen to The Cryptid Keeper podcast. No, no, calm down, this isn't going to rattle your nerves more with tales of homicidal Yetis or Killer Krampii (Krampuses?) - instead, this episode tracks down sightings of the Jolly Old Elf himself, Santa Claus! I know what you're thinking, "Oh, this is some puff piece for the kids, etc.," wrong again - this is about people Really Seeing Santa Claus ... I don't want to say more and spoil the surprise. It's charming (and OK, a little bit creepy) and the perfect way to end our run this year on the K.A.C.


     Thanks to my son Justin for finding this and for suggesting The Woman In Black for today's tale, and thanks to all of you for joining me for another year. We'll leave you with one last quote, which on closer look may sound like a familiar riff to a number of my friends, just adapted for the season - until next year at this same time, Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

Wednesday, December 23, 2020

K.A.C. 2020 - T - 2 ...


     Are you all ready for Jolabokaflod tomorrow night? What am I talking about? What are YOU talking about? Isn't it a family tradition in your house? Don't you do that EVERY Christmas Eve? Midnight Mass, you say? Well, sure, but what about BEFORE that? 

     Everyone has traditions of the season - Laura's family always let the kids open One Gift on Christmas Eve, usually a small one. That was unheard of in my house - it was all or nothing on Christmas morning and that was that! I'm rather partial to the 'Christmas Book Flood', although our house is already deluged in books; it's just a few more trying to tip the craft over once and for all.



     If you don't have time for a full book, how about a poem? is reporting today is a very special day: "(In 1823), a newspaper in Troy, New York, publishes an anonymous poem with the memorable opening line, "Twas the night before Christmas, when all thro' the house…" Literature professor Clement Clarke Moore will later be identified as the author of the poem that will help define the modern Santa Claus."



     Covid Lockdown is getting to us all this holiday season, so folks are looking for ways to bring some joy to their enforced quarantining, including dressing up their toddlers as Elf On The Shelf and dangling them from chandeliers! Before you reach for that phone to call an intervention hotline, however, take a look at the article below - all is not always what it seems!


     Finally, you may have seen the story making the rounds about the Spam and Oreos 'burger' being sold by McDonalds in China - think that's the grossest thing the mega-huge, workwide fast food chain sells? Think again! For once I'll spare you the pictures ...


     And with that, we're almost at the end of the road. We'll wrap up the year tomorrow with our annual Christmas Ghost Story and any last-minute news items that strike our fancy - see you then !

Tuesday, December 22, 2020

K.A.C. 2020 - T - 3 ...


     We've only three days left! The Guardian (UK) has an article out today on why the Muppets Christmas Carol is the 'perfect festive film'. Phew - dodged a bullet there! I thought the author was about to write 'the best filmed version of the story ever made', and then we get into throw down territory. Some folks are all, "eh, you've seen one version, you've seen them all", while others (myself included) have one particular favorite they watch year after year. Given the nature of this blog, I can safely say I've seen more versions than most folks, from the silent era to many obscure variations, both from film and TV. My personal favorite is the 1984 version with George C. Scott as Scrooge and Edward Woodward in a magnificent turn as the Ghost of Christmas Present (seen at right) ... oh, sure, he's jolly and welcoming when you first see him, but he's also the Wraith of Wrath who won't put up with ANY of Scrooge's crap - turning his own words against him is just the tip of that particular iceberg! If you haven't seen this version, you owe it to yourself and your family and friends to do so. But back to the Muppets - having just said that about all the different versions I've seen, believe it or not, I never did get around to watching this until last weekend, thanks to my friend Gina. Turns out it's a personal favorite of hers and I can see why. It's a charming version of the story from beginning to end and is a great way to introduce children to the oft-told tale. It does make some changes to fit in more of the characters from the Muppet Universe (my ears went up right at the beginning when it opened with "the Marleys were dead" ... wait a minute, Marleys? As in PLURAL? TWO Marleys? Now with most adaptations I'd be, "Right, that's it, I'm out of here", but I thought about it for a moment and instantly got who they were casting for this and it absolutely worked!).

     Read the Guardian article here:



While you're reading it (or better yet, while you're snuggled in watching these or YOUR favorite version of the tale), why not go all in, Brit-wise, and have a cup of tea and some biscuits? What, you say, biscuits? Like what you eat with fried chicken? Sigh ... no, biscuits (or 'disgestives', as I also found out they're called, when Laura and I went to London in 2016) are cookies to go with your tea. OK, that's settled, let's just grab any old bag and throw it in the microwave with some water ... whoa, whoa, settle down there, you unwashed heathen! THAT'S not the proper way to do things! Thankfully for you, I have JUST the person to help you out in All Matters Tea - my friend Kara just HAPPENS to have a Tea Blog called Lady Grey Moonlight AND it just HAPPENS to currently be featuring a stroll through a Christmas Tea Advent Calendar! The photos and comments alone make me thirsty - THIS is tea done right! The link below showcases the first day of the Advent Calendar, but you need to go completely down the rabbit hole and read the whole blog to see what you've been missing all these years!


     Two days to go! Join us tomorrow as we wrap up our last silly stories of the season and then we'll leave you on Thursday with our annual Christmas ghost story. It's a classic chiller you won't soon forget and there's no redemption for ANYBODY in this tale - Scrooge's story would have ended a LOT worse if he's come up against the star of our show  see you then!

Monday, December 21, 2020

K.A.C. 2020 - T - 4 ...


     This little fellow is here to remind you to, if at all possible, get out tonight and go see the major conjunction of the stars - it won't happen again in any of our lifetimes!


     Let's turn the K.A.C. Wayback Machine to December 2nd, 2011, and the first (but far from the last) of Spectacular Santa Fails - as I reported then: "Happy Friday! I knew if I waited long enough, somebody somewhere would uncover some holiday Internet Gold! This year's winner comes to us from Palm Beach Gardens, Florida ... "Hey, kids, let's cheer on Santa as he rappels from the upper tiers of the Mall to his throne for pictures! YAY!"

    It all went well in the practice run ... which I might mention was NOT done in a full Santa suit and beard ... let's say that again: NOT in a full Santa suit ... and BEARD ...
Thankfully it was all caught on video and you can see Santa's infamous entrance. Hey, be grateful YOU aren't the parent having to explain what just happened to Santa!"


      I figured that was that, Santa had learned his lesson ... not a bit of it! EXACTLY on year later (December 2nd, 2012), what am I reporting AGAIN but an eerily similar deja vu story: "Oh, Santa ... not again! We talked about this last year ... you've just got to accept that you're TOO OLD for these kinds of shenanigans! I know you want to look all cool and hip for the young kids, but ...

     Not to panic, this isn't a photo of Suicide Santa - but before I explain what it IS, take a look back at my blog entry from EXACTLY one year ago today (December 2nd, 2011) - Palm Beach, Florida ... shopping mall ... and Santa gets his beard caught while rappelling down to his chair.

     Fast forward to THIS year, change the location from the US to the UK and what do we see ??? You guessed it! Santa rappelling down to the CROWDED mall getting his beard stuck in the cable. Much jeering ensued (he was stuck there for a good half-hour until he was cut out of it) ... the whole story (with video!) can be found here:"


     WHY am I bringing this up, you ask? Did Santa get his beard stuck rappelling into a mall AGAIN? NO !!! He DID learn his lesson from those two humiliating experiences - instead, he went HIGH TECH for 2020 and caught himself all tangled up in ELECTRICAL WIRES while PARAGLIDING! Guess which unlucky Elf had to be rescued by the Fire Department? Stick to SLEIGHS, Old Man! Read it and weep: 



     Let's turn spotlight off of Klutz Kringle for now and instead celebrate the latest 'Grotty Grotto' that has sprung up in the UK! This was another of those drive-through, stay-in-your-car and enjoy the sights and sounds, such as this vaguely serial-killer-ish 'Ebenezer Scrooge' who scared the crap out of kids! 

     We could forgive it if it was just creepy Ebenezer, but no - they doubled down with what one parent called 'an absolute disgrace!" Far be it from me to spoil it for you any further - read on!


      OK, we'll try to turn this around and end on a high note today. If you read my article yesterday about my futile attempts to get two treasured models for Christmas, you heard me talk about the Sears Wish Book. Just to give you an idea of HOW instrumental it was for most kids' Christmas dreams, check out this great site that showcases a sampling of the must-have toys from the Book, stretching from the years 1937 - 1988! Enjoy!



      Only three more entries to go - see you tomorrow!

Sunday, December 20, 2020

K.A.C. 2020 - T - 5 ...


Today's entry should serve as a cautionary tale to you all: be careful what you wish for! Our story takes place in 1969 - I'm 12 years old and the family is once again asking me what I want for Christmas. Keep in mind this is LONG before the Internet, when most kids (myself included) would either decide what was their heart's desire that year from A) -  the Sears Wish Book (seen at left), which was mailed to everyone's house months in advance and kids like me would 'circle for Santa' (who must have had an 'in' with Sears) what they wanted, or B) - would tell the adults what they wanted after seeing the barrage of ads on TV over and over again, day after day after ... keep that point in mind as we go forth.

     My Mom and other relatives each year gave me something they thought I would like. Being the 1960s, I was a dyed-in-the-wool 'Monster Kid', and was living, breathing, eating everything monsters, thanks to magazines like Famous Monsters Of Filmland, etc., and shows like The Munsters and The Addams Family on TV. So of course, what did I want for Christmas? MONSTERS! What did I get? Anything but ... sigh.

     The 1960s was the time of the Monster Craze, the Spy Craze (James Bond 007, The Man From U.N.C.L.E., etc.) and the Superhero Craze, specifically Marvel (circa 1966), with the Saturday morning Spider-Man cartoon (which future Fritz The Cat animator Ralph Bakshi worked on), as well as Hanna-Barbera's animated Fantastic Four cartoon (STILL the best one made, just by adapting the actual comics ... seriously, how hard is that???) - the photo at right can be dated via the Superhero Craze, as it shows me (at age 9) on Christmas morning with an opened board game to my right (your left as you look at the picture) - after blowing it up and some judicious investigative work, I figured out it was the board game below: the Amazing Spider-Man game, with the 'Marvel Super-Heroes' (a topic for another blog entry another time). SO Monsters were out, Spys were out, but Superheroes were OK - got it. Happy as can be, right? Here's the problem: I was also an only child and an original latch-key kid in a Boston apartment, with a Mom who worked a nursing shift 3:30 - midnight most days, and I did not know another kid in the neighborhood AT ALL, since I went to school not only out of town, but out of STATE (I went to a military boarding school in Tennessee and only came home for two weeks at Christmas and during the summer). So my family's propensity for board games was sort of wasted on me: how many games could I win playing either by myself or against the family dog? The satisfying answer is ALL OF THEM, but even that novelty wore off after awhile. 

      Enter Grandma Ruby, my Dad's mom, who was visiting us from Ohio and was staying with us over the holidays. Let me back up here and mention my Dad had passed away when I was five, so it was just my Mom, me and our poodle, Toodles (DEFINITELY another blog entry for another time). I've mentioned Grandma Ruby before in these pages, particularly her indulging her grandson in his Monster Mania, when no one else would, by going with me to the corner drugstore, buying me the monthly copy of Famous Monsters Of Filmland, which I would devour, then hide under the bed until my Mom found it, threw it out and explained to Ruby she didn't want that magazine in her house, with Ruby smiling sweetly the whole time and nodding, then buying me next month's issue, etc. Long story short: my Mom finally caved - go US! :)

     Back to 1969 - here's where the story goes off the rails. Remember my mentioning about being at military school? While I received a great education there (much better than I would have received at Boston Public Schools at the time), I also had NO access to TV, so would literally binge-watch anything and everything when I was home over the summer and Christmas. One of the advantages of having a Mom who worked the evening shift was having the TV completely to myself most evenings, ALL EVENING, and no parental censorship in what I could or could not see. Many a night my Mom would get home at 1AM to find the apartment completely dark, with only the eerie glow of a cathode-ray TV set, giving off a hissing sound as nothing but static snow filled the screen (years before all-night programming), and then having to try and drag me out from UNDER the couch, wrapped in a blanket and passed out. WHY under the couch? Because this Monster Kid was going to get his fix somehow, by watching reruns of The Outer Limits or The Twilight Zone or Shock Theater (which ran all the Universal monster movies), and under the couch was the only safe place to watch them, duh! 

     It was also around this time that I branched out into science fiction. My first and still favorite childhood love was LOST IN SPACE, which led me to Irwin Allen's other sci-fi shows of the '60s: THE TIME TUNNEL, LAND OF THE GIANTS and VOYAGE TO THE BOTTOM OF THE SEA. Then there was STAR TREK. I remember watching the show, but not being that great a fan of it. However, I readily admit my mind may be playing tricks with me, as my Mom used to tell me it was the One Show every week that I would ask to see (on the rare times she was home) with a TV Dinner in front of the set - she swore I was obsessed with that show! That's a Very Long Explanation and setup for you to understand what comes next. Let's go with Mom's theory, it will help to explain the perfect storm that's coming. Take one obsessive kid, add the OTHER big hobby of the '60s, namely plastic model making, and one indulgent Grandmother - what could POSSIBLY go wrong? 

     Remember when I said at the beginning of this article there were TWO ways of having your Christmas wishes known, the first being the Sears catalog and the second being the incessant TV ads? Well, the ads were Seriously Pushing that YOU (YES, YOU!) could build and OWN your Very Own Starship Enterprise! How cool would THAT look in my room? Well, this wasn't just a want, a need, this was Life and Death to my brain and I mercilessly hounded and explained to Grandma Ruby what I HAD TO HAVE OR I WAS GONNA DIE (only a bit exaggerating here) for Christmas that year! She sweetly smiled and I waited for the Big Day ... ladies and gentlemen, BEHOLD the absolute BANE of my existence for 1969! Grandma Ruby, bless her, had NO INKLING of what STAR TREK was and just told the fellow at the department store that her favorite grandson had his eye on that nice Enterprise model. I opened up this HUGE box on Christmas morning, thinking it was a LOT bigger than it looked on the TV ads - the wrapping paper came off the box, the scales fell from my eyes, and I stared in DISBELIEF and HORROR at the Revell USS Enterprise Nuclear Carrier! You can only GUESS how well that went down ... I started to cry, and said, "That wasn't what I wanted!", only to be carted out by my Mom and told to shut up and say thank you, that Grandma Ruby had paid a lot of money for it, etc., and that I will damn well like it and take it (which I sniffingly did). Just looking it over, though, I knew this was WAY out of my league. This thing had what looked like a MILLION tiny pieces - mind you, I could BARELY glue together body part A to body part B on my few (VERY FEW) Aurora monster models - sigh. Actually, my Mom's brilliant solution (and it was a good one) was taking it in to the VA Hospital where she was Head Nurse and having the patients make it. They did a magnificent job and it came back and taunted me in my room for years - and by the way, I never DID get the Starship Enterprise model - sigh # 2. 

     For most kids, the story would end there - lesson learned. Not THIS intrepid soul! Grandma Ruby got some wind of what happened somehow (maybe it was the wailing coming not from the drafty windows of the apartment or the poodle ...) and wanted to make it right. 1969 was ALSO the year LAND OF THE GIANTS was on the air in prime time - my latest obsession. It has GIANTS, Man! It also had a Very Cool spacehip the Earth people (or 'Little People', as they were known on the show) had, called the Spindrift, and yes, Aurora had a model for THAT, as well! Sooooo ... (you can see where this is going, right?) I figured there was NO WAY Grandma Ruby could screw THIS up, what with the name of the show and the distinctive name of the spacecraft! 


     Off she went to make things right and came back pleased as punch, telling that nice young man at the department store EXACTLY what I said: LAND OF THE GIANTS, check. SPINDRIFT, check. I opened up the package and just STARED in slack-jawed horror (I'm getting chills all over again just writing this!) - I have no idea how or where she found this, but instead of the Aurora plastic model of the ship, she had found the Remco TOOTHPICK CRAFT MODEL! Take a moment to let the sheer terror of this sink in! It had a cardboard base with a million holes punched out in it, wherein you took TOOTHPICKS (TOOTHPICKS!) and lined them up One At A Time, putting one end of the toothpick into Hole A, then BENDING the GODDAMN TOOTHPICK (did I mention TOOTHPICKS???) to fit it into Hole B and did that OVER AND OVER until you built up the shell of the ship! What sadistic, deranged mind thought this up? I couldn't even cry over this one - I was just numb. I remember mumbling some sort of thank you over this (under the withering glare of my mother) and sitting at the dining table TRYING to do this - SNAP!, went one toothpick, SNAP! went the next one ... thankfully (?) there was a bag of about a thousand of them, but it didn't matter, I was all thumbs with this monstrosity and after a few more eternitys of frustration, wanted nothing more to do with it. Again, Mom took it into the VA and those stalwart souls made it and returned it to me - and again, you guessed it, I never got the Spindrift model - le sigh # 3.

     So there you have it, boys and girls. Take it from this battle-scarred old soul: Be Careful What You Wish For! One quick postscript and I'm done: MANY years later, Laura and I were at a Christmas Collectibles Show at the BaySide Expo Center here in Boston around 1990 and were going up and down the aisles looking at vintage toys and games, when I turned the corner at the end of one aisle and there, all by itself, was this TOOTHPICK TOY FROM HELL. I stopped in my tracks and let out a small, sickly shriek of horror and pointed it out to her, and her reply was, "Yeah, it's a toy, so what? Oh, that's the one you told me about", NOT comprehending the sheer malevolence of this Nightmare Craft Kit from my childhood. The Sun lost all its warmth and my soul shriveled a tiny bit inside and I couldn't wait to get out of there and head home. Brrrrr ......


      As I mentioned to Laura and Justin, I couldn't believe I've done this blog for twelve years and have never told this story! All of my friends have heard the in-person narrative of this (and I think secretly enjoy it, as I get myself worked up into a frenzy every time I tell it - some things are just that scarring!). 

     Phew! OK, thanks for the catharsis - we'll be back tomorrow with OTHER folks' horror tales of the season!

Saturday, December 19, 2020

K.A.C. 2020 - T - 6 ...


Heinrich Kley, Der Fund im Winterwalde
     Our painting today is called 'Discovery In Wintry Forest', by Heinrich Kley. He was a popular German illustrator, who was compared to Walt Disney at one time and is all but forgotten now. He had a very playful style drawing all sorts of monsters and mythological creatures. To see more of his work, click here:


   It's the time of year to settle in with your old favorite Christmas movies, or discover new ones. From Hallmark cookie-cutter weepies to cute kids films to fantasies to Christmas horrors, there's something for everyone. Ever wonder what HAPPENED to those cute kids in all those films, such as Taylor Momsen (below), seen here in Jim Carrey's live-action Grinch movie? Well, The Sun (UK) did and the results are pretty interesting - check them out here!


     Continuing with the movie theme here, want to take a guess WHICH holiday has the MOST horror/scary films associated with it? Well, Big Hint: if I'm mentioning it in this blog, I think it's pretty safe money which one to bet on - yep! For such a time of 'comfort and joy', there's also a lot of 'screaming and dread' involved with Christmas ... 'tis the season, indeed! Give a look at how YOUR favorite holiday stacked up compared to it at the link below:


     Back tomorrow with more!

Friday, December 18, 2020

K.A.C. 2020 - T - 7 ...


     Annnnnnnnnnnddddddddddd .... it's an anniversary date for three Very Special People at the K.A.C. - it was on this date, December 18th, 1956, that WGN-TV in Chicago introduced kiddies to The Three Dwarfs: Hardrock, Coco and Joe! It's become a holiday staple now around the country and here at the K.A.C., as well - I should warn you, however, that the song that accompanies the video is a total earworm --- once it's in your head, it's IMPOSSIBLE to get out! Oh, and a further warning: don't get too close to Santa here ... he bites!

     Damnit --- I just listened to it again! Grrr ... now it's stuck in my head! Sigh ... 



     We started this year with a look back at the 1918 Spanish Flu epidemic and a look at the different posters and advertisements warning people to take the proper precautions. Pat found this yesterday and shared it, this time from World War I, regarding the fight against tuberculosis. The full story can be found below, but it's fascinating how you could publish this today without changing a word of copy and it would still be just as effective: 0Ok9TMl1iWpP6JbD3kuryaJtLSRVpy_3bNlaDT-AueKM



     I'm all for Christmas traditions, such as Santa and his sleigh, but one must consider the planet and the ecological damage that happens thanks to this voyage every year ... what am I talking about? REINDEER FARTS, that's what! Oh, sure, you're laughing NOW, but see what you think after reading THIS disturbing scientific article!


     More tomorrow!

Thursday, December 17, 2020

K.A.C. 2020 - T - 8 ...

     Only eight days to go! Even though Christmas parties are out this year, office AND home, you can STILL make room for Festive Holiday Treats, like thi ..., ummm .... Tuna Christmas Tree! Oh, we're just scratching the surface (of the toilet bowl) with Herself the Elf here ... there's also the Glazed Potato Ring, the Duck Moussee En Gelee' and MORE! Make sure you're hungry and click below - thanks to Joann for the idea!


     But wait, you say! If I'm recreating my holiday party at home sans guests, I want to go all the way, with appetizers and everything! OK, we hear you - behold the Cherry and Banana Mold Christmas Salad! Not to your taste (or anyone's)? Not a problem  there' plenty more where THAT came from!


     Now that your appetite is REALLY peaking, on to the Main Course! Choose from the Holiday Meat Tree (seen below, with handy recipe!), the Noel Glazed Ham (NOT as delicious as it sounds), the Turkey Fruit Salad or a number of other food crimes! These will satisfy your cravings for a long time to come!

     But what about dessert, you ask? Save room, 'cause we've got a ton of choices here, too! Start off with a yummy Prune whip (seen below), or Ham Banana Rolls, served with Orange Licorice ice cream - YUM!






     Two more cornucopias of crapulousness follow: 


     Since you've been SO good about sitting through theses culinary nightmares, how about instead you treat yourself to some GOOD food, namely what would have been on the holiday menu in the time of A Christmas Carol. Everything from appetizers to roast goose to figgy pudding (below) - and all with recipes to make them yourself! There, you see, we've spared you the bad and ended with the good - it's another Christmas miracle from the K.A.C.!


      Tomorrow we hit the One Week mark, or more appropriately for this year, as they say in The Ring, "Seven Days!" See you then!

Wednesday, December 16, 2020

K.A.C. 2020 - T - 9 ...

     Welcome back! We're down to the single digits - before we get to today's entries, let's see how you did on yesterday's Kwiz. The celebs from top to bottom were:

    - Shirley Temple

    - Julie Christie

    - John Lydon (aka Johnny Rotten)

    - Nat King Cole and daughter Natalie Cole

    - Robin Williams

    - Elvis Presley

    - Salvador Dali

    - Donna Summer

    - Bette Davis

    - Audrey Hepburn

    - Chuck Connors



     OK, now that that's done ... forget those posers, here's MY favorite celebrity of 2020! Ladies and gentlemen, meet Frank the Gargoyle. He seems calm and innocent enough, until you put a Christmas Hat on him. THEN the fur starts to fly! This is hands-down my favorite Christmas story of 2020, and its already gone viral on Facebook and is now being picked up by national and international news agencies, including my go-to spot for Christmas weirdness, The Sun (UK). Rather than spoil it for you, if you haven't already seen this, read on! My thanks to Amber for alerting me to the original breaking story!


     NOTHING is going to top that today, so we'll stop there - see you tomorrow!

Tuesday, December 15, 2020

K.A.C. 2020 - T - 10 ...

     Ten days to go! One of our more popular features every year on the K.A.C. is our Kringle's Khristmas Kuties Kwiz - the rules are simple: below are eleven pictures of different celebrities during the holiday season. All YOU have to do is correctly identify them, top to bottom (click on the pix for a larger look)! I originally thought of doing a 'Best Of ...' selection from years' past, but realized that would be too easy - all you'd have to do is scroll through and find the answers! Instead, we have an all-new 2020 batch of folks, so don your Santa Hat and Elf Ears and give it a shot - answers tomorrow!



Monday, December 14, 2020

K.A.C. 2020 - T - 11 ...

      Among the other Christmas traditions you may be foregoing this year, I think it's safe to skip Santa's cookies and milk ...partially because you REALLY don't want somebody who's been in Every House In The World in one night in your place and partially because you need to stop and THINK OF THE COOKES! What do I mean? Click on the video below (from our December 15th, 2009 entry):



     Next up, points to this young man who answered honestly and correctly the question on his Christmas quiz --- the word you're looking for is 'baubles', teach! Read the article and stay for the comments!


     Years ago on the K.A.C. I featured a vintage Christmas ladies hairdo in the shape of a tree - I figured that was a one and done - NOPE! Gaze in shock and AWE at THESE ladies 'do's'!!!

     Coming tomorrow! Put on YOUR Christmas Thinking Hair for our ALL-NEW Kringle's Khristmas Kuties Kwiz! See you then!

Sunday, December 13, 2020

K.A.C. 2020 - T - 12 ...


     A picture is worth a thousand words - and this picture perfectly sums up Christmas, 2020. Santa with a face mask and fist bumping tykes through plexiglass ... sigh. The Associated Press ran the story recently about the changes in store (no pun intended) for Mall Santas this year, and they're not good. Of course, you have to stop and ask yourself, "What the Hell am I doing taking my kids to a mall in the first place in the middle of a pandemic?" The original article can be found below:

           YOU may be fine with it, but it's driving Santa bugnuts - so much so that he's turning to ... other methods ... to get him through the day. We've documented Santa's run-ins with drugs before, particularly of the mushroom variety. One good hit of those and you're seeing glowing red reindeer noses, sleighs flying around the world in one night, and more! Here's two of the best entries from 2009: first, from December 2nd:


"Heigh-Ho, My Holiday Hallucinogens! Perhaps I should say "HIGH-HO" when you see today's entry ... I did promise they'd get weirder with each passing day, as we got closer and closer to the final day of the countdown. Well, look no further than today, as we investigate Santa on 'Shrooms! Yes, sadly true - the entire story is here for you to peruse:


     Next, not content to leave well enough alone, Kringle decided to invest whole hog in the Merry Muscaria Experience, and bring some Interesting Friends along, as recounted in our December 8th entry entitled Jesus, Santa, Mithra and the Magic Mushroom (aka The Atlantean Conspiracy!).

         "OK, kiddies, strap yourselves in extra-tight to your Surreal Sleighs today, as I've got a little number that is gonna mess with your heads Big-Time! Did you know that literally EVERYTHING you thought you knew about Christmas was WRONG? Did you know that Every Single Thing regarding Christmas has to do with the AMANITA MUSCARIA MUSHROOM???!!!
According to what you're about to read, it's TRUE!!! 

       It's a looooong read, but stay with it to the end, as the author makes some AMAZING connections that you DON'T want to miss! Profane? Absolutely! Blasphemous? You betcha! Weird Beyond Belief? All That And MORE!!! Just WAIT 'till you get to some of his symbology ... I don't want to spoil it for you, but if you haven't already decorated your Christmas tree, you might want to forgo the tinsel this year ... just sayin'."



     Not to end today on a total down note, but remember earlier when I reported Dr. Anthony Fauci saying Santa had 'good innate immunity'? Well, seems the NHS (National Health Service) in Great Britain didn't GET that message! Instead, they put out an ad to counter all those touchy-feely feel-good Christmas ads barraging the airwaves this time of year! To be fair, it's a very effective ad, and (for them) it IS a feel good ad ... not everybody thought so, however, including a TON of parents who were outraged! Watch it and you'll see why - maybe Santa should have stuck with social distancing after all!



     I'm not even going to TRY and top that today - back tomorrow with more!