Wednesday, December 10, 2014

K.A.C. 2014 - T - 15 ...

     I'm just going to leave this here ...

     Speaking of presents, what 
 better day to take a moment and 
 look at the 88th edition of the 
 Neiman-Marcus Fantasy Gifts for 
 Christmas! Have more money than sense? Then this is the place for you! From a $35,000 Imperial Shaker (no, that is NOT a Star Wars reference!) to a $55,000 bill for a personal trousseau and beyond, this year's gift ideas range from the bizarre to the inspired. There are 10 choices in all, with prices ranging from $25,000 to $475,000 ... that is not a typo ... here's a look at what the very rich are getting and giving this year.




         Starting with the most expensive item, for $475,000 you can get your own custom scent made for you from the House of Creed ateliers. How exclusive is this gift? It is only available for ONE customer - the first one to pony up the cash gets the bragging rights to this one - take THAT, Black Friday shoppers! It comes with a trip to Paris to consult with the Master Perfumer about your favorite scents, etc. (I'm THIS close to inserting a bean joke here ... this is why I will not be allowed to get this gift ... well, that and the price tag!) - there's much more to the gift, though - to get a full idea of what it entails, read the link below:,m&r=cat48140738&rdesc=The%20Fantasy%20Gifts&pageName=THE_HOUSE_OF_CREED_BESPOKE_FRAGRANCE_JOURNEY&icid=CBF14_H7M48  

     If you get shut out on that, you can get in on the Vanity Fair Academy Awards experience, where you can pretend to be a celebrity for a weekend and be part of the glitz and glamour of Academy Awards night. Spa treatments, loaned-out jewels, the red carpet ... it's all there and all yours for a measly $425,000! Just like the perfume, though, it's first come, first served and only available to ONE Neiman-Marcus customer. Sounds great, right? Oh, so tony and all that ... there is one tiny thing missing, however. You would think for almost half-a-mil they could throw in a couple of tickets to the damn Academy Award ceremony ITSELF, even if it were in the nosebleed seats in the balcony! Nope! You, Mr. and Mrs. Trendsetter, get to get all pampered and dolled up and watch it on TV like everybody else, then go to the party!  Pffffftttt!  Here's the link to read more:,m&r=cat48140738&rdesc=The%20Fantasy%20Gifts&pageName=VANITY_FAIR_ACADEMY_AWARDS_EXPERIENCE&icid=CBF14_H7M46

      So, now you've gone from smelling stinky good to dropping a bundle of scratch to go to a party where nobody knows you and are wondering why you're there and you now feel like an idiot. How do you console yourself? By going home to your mansion to play in the basement (by yourself, probably) with your custom-built $300,000 slot car raceway! What? Yep, ol' P.T. Barnum would be chortling gleefully over this year's list - ' a fool and his money', etc. What makes this track any different from the one you got from Sears as a kid? Well, you're going to need a slightly larger space for this one ... try 30 feet by 12 feet! Plus, in addition to the track itself (which is a meticulous recreation of a famous course), it comes with TV monitors and announcers to show where your cars are at all times. This kicker? For your inaugural opening night race/party, two 'racing legends' will come and co-host your party live ... I think somebody lost a bet here and are having to pay up. For the whole skinny on this one, go here:,a,b,c,e&r=cat48140738&cidShots=m,a,b,c,z&rdesc=The%20Fantasy%20Gifts&pageName=SLOT_MODS_USA_ULTIMATE_SLOT_CAR_RACEWAY&icid=CBF14_H7M41

     There's plenty more to choose from, if your largesse knows no bounds, from $100,000 custom jewelry to a $95,000 limited edition Maserati, or from a $65,000 peacock floral sculpture (let that one sink in a moment) to the aforementioned Tanqueray Imperial Shaker (at $35,000), it's a world gone mad. I'd like to think no one actually buys these Fantasy Gifts every year, but I have a sinking suspicion someone out there does.


     Come back tomorrow for more LOWBROW entertainment - you can afford it, we promise! 

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